svgurl: (smallville: clark/oliver dreaming)
svgurl ([personal profile] svgurl) wrote2010-12-07 08:52 pm

fic: home is where the heart is

Title: Home is Where the Heart is
Fandom: Smallville
Pairing/Character(s): Clark/Oliver
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: all characters belong to CW/DC Comics
Word Count: 2312
Spoilers/Warnings: none/slash
Summary: Clark and Oliver reunite on Christmas Eve
Author's Notes: For [livejournal.com profile] ravenjune; thanks to my beta [livejournal.com profile] boltgirl426 for all her help!

“Clark?”

Clark Kent snapped out of his thoughts, and turned his attention toward the person saying his name, only to find his mother, Kara, Lois and Chloe staring at him with worried expressions on their faces.

“Yeah?” he asked.

“Are you all right, sweetie?” Martha questioned. “You’ve been out of it the entire evening.”

Forcing a smile, he said, “I am fine.” But he knew he wasn’t fooling anyone. Hell, if he couldn’t make himself believe those words, how could he convince the people who knew him best?

“I’m sorry,” he added, “What were you guys saying?”

“Nothing important, Smallville,” Lois assured him. “Chloe was just asking when the General was going to be here, and I said that the weather probably held him up.”

“Well, it’s still early,” Chloe chipped in, glancing at the clock.

Clark nodded, trying to seem interested. Lois’s father was joining them for dinner, as was her sister. Chloe’s dad was even going to make the drive. It was going to be a nice, large dinner. But even the thought of having a lot of people over did nothing to snap him out of his bad mood.

It was Christmas Eve; he should be happy. His mom had come home, Chloe and Lois were both there, and even Kara had made it back. The farm was all decorated, and his mother had cooked enough food to feed over a dozen people. Everything was perfect. But he wasn’t happy. No, he was lost and lonely, even when surrounded by the ones he loved.

Maybe because the one person who you want to be here isn’t. He closed his eyes, lost in thoughts of chocolate brown eyes, spiky blonde hair and a smile that always caused his heart to race. Don’t think about him. You have to move on. But that was easier said than done.

One thing was for certain: he needed to get out of there. Standing up suddenly, he announced, “I’m going to take a walk.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw them exchange concerned looks, but he couldn’t bring himself to reassure them. Instead, he just grabbed his jacket (for appearance’s sake, of course) and left.

Once outside, he took a deep breath, taking a moment to appreciate his surroundings. Smallville in winter really was beautiful. A few months ago, he had been excited for the holidays, thinking that he had finally found someone to share his life with and looking forward to spending Christmas with said person, but that hadn’t been the case.

Swallowing hard, he pushed the thoughts out of his head. Yet that’s all he could think of. Growling in frustration, he decided the walk wasn’t good enough. So he broke into a run, the world disappearing as he sped through Smallville.

Stopping a few minutes later, Clark looked around. Realizing where he had stopped, he sighed. No matter how much he tried to forget, it was clear that his heart led him to the place where his mind was avoiding going.

Now he was standing in front of the LuthorCorp building, which hid the man he loved. The man he was afraid he would always be in love with … Oliver Queen. Even standing at ground level, he could see a light on. Clearly, Ollie was stilling working.

It felt like ages since he had seen his ex-boyfriend, but the other man was never far from his mind. Clark hardly remembered why they broke up, but he had regretted it every single day after, just had too much pride to go and make amends.

Their relationship had started off so well, and then just taken a turn for the worse. However, Clark had never been happier than he had been when he was with Oliver, and now … now, he was miserable.

He just couldn’t go on like this anymore. Maybe if he talked to Oliver … maybe if Oliver missed him as much as he missed him ... then they could have a second chance. This time, he wouldn’t let go; he would fight, because a future without Oliver by his side wasn’t one he wanted to imagine.

Walking toward the door, he tried to open it but much to his displeasure, he found it to be locked. Taking a few steps back, he frowned. There was a balcony outside Oliver’s office, but how could he get there? Sure, he could’ve called, but a quick check proved that he had left his cell phone at home.

For not the first time, he wished he could fly. I need to get up there. The longing he felt to see Oliver, to hold him in his arms was overwhelming. If flying was what it would took, then damn it, he would fly. He hadn’t flown since he was possessed by Kal-El.

But that is Kal-El, he reminded himself. All of a sudden, a realization hit him. He was Kal-El. So he should be able to fly. Perhaps that was the problem all along; he had been separating his two identities. Up till now, he was either Clark Kent or Kal-El but in reality, he was both.

What if he never needed to learn how to fly? All this time, he might have been able to fly already, just needed to really try. All he really had to do was believe.

Seconds after figuring that out, he was in the air. No longer was flight just a possibility but a reality; he was flying. Moments later, he landed on Oliver’s balcony, stunned at the discovery of the power he had been fighting for ages to conquer. Finally.

But he would dwell on this later. His mind went blank as he looked through the glass, seeing the man he loved behind it. Oliver was sitting at his desk, quietly working. He wasn’t smiling; just seriously staring at his laptop. Clark’s heart broke at the sight.

Come on, Kent. You can do this. Taking a deep breath, he summed up all his courage and knocked at the large glass doors.

Oliver started at the sound, his gaze darting toward it. Their eyes met and Oliver’s expression changed to one of shock. Clark smiled and gave a little wave. That seemed to bring him back to reality, and Ollie quickly stood, making his way to the door in a few long strides.

Unlocking it, he slid it opened and stared at Clark. “What are you doing here?”

“I was in the area and thought I’d stop by?” Clark offered, smiling sheepishly. Now that he was face-to-face with Oliver, he realized how unprepared he really was.

Oliver raised an eyebrow, but moved aside. “Well, then you might as well come in.”

Clark did just that. Ollie locked the door behind him and gestured to the couch. “Have a seat.”

“Thanks,” Clark responded, sitting on the aforementioned couch.

Ollie sat back on his desk chair and watched him. An awkward silence fell, neither quite knowing what to say. Clark was the first to speak.

“So,” he said, rubbing his hands together, not quite meeting Oliver’s gaze. “How are you?” Wow, that was lame. But he really didn’t have anything better.

“I’m okay,” Oliver said slowly. “And yourself?”

“I’m fine,” Clark answered. That’s a lie. Forcing himself to look up, his green eyes locked with Oliver’s brown ones and he realized that Ollie didn’t believe it either.

“Sure you are,” Oliver retorted. “That’s exactly why, instead of being with mom on Christmas Eve, you’re in my office.” The blond frowned. “Speaking of which, how did you even get up on the balcony?”

“I flew,” Clark muttered before he could stop himself. Ollie heard him and his jaw dropped.

“Excuse me?”

“I flew,” Clark repeated.

“But … since when can you fly?” Oliver questioned, visibly bewildered.

“Since just now,” Clark explained. Ducking his head, he continued, “The doors were locked and I wanted to see you. This was the only way I could get here.”

“You started flying because you wanted to see me?” Oliver questioned. There was something about the way he said it that had Clark lifting his head once more. An unrecognizable emotion had filled Ollie’s eyes.

“Yes,” was the only word that escaped his lips.

“It must be something important then,” Oliver remarked. “But I can’t imagine that it would be so important that you would sacrifice time with your mother on Christmas Eve just to see me. She is home, isn’t she?”

“Yeah, mom’s there,” Clark admitted. “Kara, Lois, and Chloe are at the farm too. The General, Lucy, and Mr. Sullivan should be showing up shortly.”

“Sounds nice,” Oliver commented.

“It should be,” Clark agreed. “But I don’t know.” Hearing footsteps, Clark was surprised as Oliver stood up and walked to his side. Taking a seat by Clark, Oliver smiled sympathetically. Clark did his best not to be affected by Ollie’s closeness but it was difficult.

“What’s wrong, Clark?” Oliver asked. Clark didn’t speak for a few minutes, trying to gather his thoughts, wondering what exactly he should spill. He knew whom his heart belonged to but did Ollie still feel the same way?

“I felt lonely,” Clark finally confessed. “Even with everyone there, I felt lonely.”

“Sometimes, even when surrounded by a crowd, a person can get lonely,” Oliver said. Clark turned toward him. Of course Oliver understood; that was the story of his life. Then again, when it came to him, Ollie always seemed to understand.

“Why are you here, Oliver?” Clark found himself asking.

“What?” Oliver was visibly puzzled at the sudden turn of the conversation.

“It’s Christmas Eve and you’re working,” Clark clarified. “Why?”

“What else am I supposed to do?” Oliver asked, his eyes no longer meeting Clark’s.

“You could come to the farm, with us,” Clark suggested. “I know that I invited you when we were still together, but even if we hadn’t been dating, I would’ve invited you over anyway.”

Ollie just sighed. “It would be weird, Clark, and we both know it.”

“No, it wouldn’t,” Clark insisted. “Just because we aren’t together anymore, does that mean we can’t be around each other either? You and Lois are friends.”

“It took a long time for Lois and I to get to where we are now,” Ollie reminded him.

“That’s could be because you and Lois just dated and later had to learn to be friends,” Clark persisted. “The two of us were friends first. Why is it so hard to go back to that?” He didn’t know why he was pushing on being friends, but he needed Oliver in his life any way he could get him. Besides, if Ollie was satisfied with friendship, that might mean he only wanted that, but if he wasn’t, it could be because he still had feelings, just like Clark. There was only one way to find out.

“Maybe one day, Clark, but not now,” Oliver was saying, a frown marring his handsome features.

“Not now … because you still have feelings for me?” Clark asked, unable to keep the note of hope out of his voice. It was a risky move, but he was ready to take a risk. Too many times he had hid his feelings in fear of rejection but now … now he couldn’t do that any longer. What was the worst that could happen?

Shoulders slumping, Oliver said, “Clark …”

“Because I still have feelings for you,” Clark said quickly. Ollie froze at that. “That’s why I felt lonely today, Oliver, because even though I was surrounded by people I love, you weren’t there,” Clark finished, staring at him.

For a few minutes, Oliver just didn’t speak, and with every second that passed, Clark grew more nervous and despondent. He feared more than ever Ollie was just thinking of a way to turn him down.

Finally, he couldn’t take it anymore and stood up, taking a few steps away. Ollie’s voice stopped him in his place.

“There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about you, about us, and about how I let you walk out of my life.”

At this, Clark spun around, staring at him incredulously.

“But we broke up for a reason, right?” Oliver asked, brown eyes seeming to plead with him. “I can’t … I can’t have you and lose you again.”

“You won’t.” It was like someone switched their personalities, with Ollie being the insecure one and Clark knowing exactly what he wanted, what he needed.

“How do you know?” Oliver quizzed.

“Because I won’t walk away this time,” Clark vowed. Moving back toward him, he crouched at Ollie’s feet. “We both made mistakes before. Since we were friends, we thought it would be easy, and when it wasn’t, we fled. But it’s not easy living without you. It’s anything but easy.”

Ollie visibly softened. “I used to be fine on my own or at least that’s what I convinced myself. Since I met you, I don’t want to be alone anymore. I’ve never needed someone the way I need you. What have you done to me, Clark Kent?”

“Nothing less than what you’ve done to me,” Clark replied, his lips curving into a smile. Hesitating a moment, he leaned forward and much to his relief, Oliver closed the remaining distance, their lips meeting in a gentle kiss.

Pulling back after a moment, Oliver rested his forehead against Clark’s. “You do know that I won’t be able to let you go anymore, right? So, if you want to do this, you damn well better be ready to get stuck with me for life.”

Clark could only laugh. “That’s the only thing I want, Oliver. Trust me, I have no plans to let you go either.”

They exchanged smiles and for the first time in months, Clark knew that everything was going to be all right.